Now that I am working on a book of my own, I read books very differently. When I first learned of this book, I was alarmed that there was already a book out there I was going to write. I was relieved to find out that Sara Solovitch decided not to pursue the piano as a career, or even as a major in College, because of her debilitating stage fright. As I read on, soon I was hooked. This was a very well executed book. I learned a lot about writing, as well as stage fright, from this book.
I wondered what made this such a page-turner for me. Of course, I was interested in the subject. However, I did not expect it to hook me the way it did for following reasons.
- The author’s examination of stage fright was pretty academic: in historical documents going back to ancient Greece, interviewing various experts including neurologists, psychologists, and performers/athletes with a history of stage fright. Even the way she documents her own trials of various methods, lessons, and exercises indicate clear sources, scientific evidence and expert opinions.
- The author’s performance experience (and therefore, her anecdotes of stage fright) were not consequential the way it would be for professionals.
After finishing the book, I really had to sit down and think about what made it work for me. There were few clear reasons I could think of.
- The story was very clear. A pianist becomes closeted. She’d given up on her aspiration to become a pianist in high school because of persistent and debilitating stage fright. She decides to give herself a year to examine and get over her stage fright and perform in front of her friends and family on her sixtieth birthday.
- The book was structured so that the readers follow the course of Sara’s year of understanding and conquering stage fright. We are interested in her research, interviews, practices of meditation, yoga and other remedies, piano practice with various teachers and methods because we want to know whether she succeeds.
- Her sentences are often super short, like two words. “I found myself at a cheery holiday part, being exhorted to play something, anything, on the host’s baby grand. I demurred. The host jovially insisted. I declined. The other guests cajoled. …How about this, he said. Yes, yes, play that, the others changed. Jump! Jump! was what I heard.” (P. 1) There is a grooving rhythm to this.
- Different historical facts are dropped like breadcrumbs to follow. Mark Twain coined the term stage-fright. (P. 24) “Studies have shown that up to 30 percent of orchestra musicians rely on beta-blockers…” (P. 26) Thomas Jefferson delivered only two speeches in his eight years as a president – his two inaugural addresses – because of stage fright (P. 31). A scholar in communication studies found a direct correlation between public speaking and suicide (P. 179)
- Interesting literatures and cultural theories are introduced. For example, Nicholas Ridout, a British cultural theorist in his Stage Fright, Animals, and Other Theatrical Problems, apparently suggests that the introduction of electricity in 1879 had a lot to do with the emergence of stage fright. The possibility of brightness and blackout in theatres allowed the presenters to demand attention on the stage, and away from each other. Theater ceased to be a place of socialization and became a place to be immersed in the presented Gesantkunstwerk. Coinciding with these shift in power to the performers, economically, performers became more dependant on the audience reception, no longer retained by courts, free-lancing. Plus, the more elevated status of “art” in society, made the performers more deeply identify with their performances. Therefore, disapproval from the audience came to signify a personal rejection from the world – an existential crisis. (P. 31-34)
- Pianist Sviatoslav Richter and singer Carly Simons, both known for their performance anxiety, turned the light on the audience and off themselves, attempting to dissuade the attention off from themselves and on the sound of music. (P. 44)
- Dorsha Hayes, an actress, dancer, poet, novelist and an essayist on Jungian psychology wrote “In our long human history, severance from the group has always held an element of danger.” Contrasted to the image of a hero/leader “who has led people to clear water” is of stoned man. (P. 138)
- The author offers clear, and universal, solutions. And she explains, sometimes scientifically, sometimes empirically, why it works
- The right teacher, and his/her support: for Sara, it was Ellen Tryba Chen. (first introduced in P. 63)
- Psychologist specializing in performance anxiety: for Sara, it was Noa Kageyama. (first introduced in P. 71), a Juilliard trained violinist and Don Green trained performance anxiety specialist.
- Exposure therapy, or extinction training (P. 97-)
- Beta-blocker. (P. 103-)
- Mindfulness, yoga, meditation (P. 115-)
- Meditation is a way to take the shock, observe, and create distance from the obsessive internal chatter (P. 124)
- The psychological benefit of switching from the first-person pronoun to the third, similar to the benefit of meditation (P. 124)
- Performance, not as “perfected presentation” but as honesty. (P. 141-to the next chapter on perfectionism)
At the end, however, the most important lesson I learned on book writing from Sara Solovitch was this. Each concept and assertion the author made in this book had human stories associated with them. That made the notions more memorable, impactful and convincing. It’s been more than ten days since I finished this book, but skimming through it in order to write this blog, I am amazed at how well I can recall each section of the book. It’s because they have names, voices, personalities and anecdotes.
I recommend this book to anyone who has ever wondered about performance anxiety at all.