This is an English translation of an article published in Nikkan San on Sep. 3, 2020, as a part of my column, “The Way of the Pianist.
“Why do I have to…?” “What am I working so hard for…?” I think perhaps we all get hijacked by these “why”s from time to time.
When I was a student at the conservatory, I was under pressure. Alone and foreign in a new country. Much investments had been made for me to study in the States. My future career was very uncertain. I dedicated most of my waking hours to practicing then. When I had a performance to work towards, it was easier. But the day after a concert, I would be on my way to the practice rooms, and sometimes, my mind was overtaken by these thoughts… “Why am I working myself to the bone?” This was difficult.
But then, one day, I remembered a story I’d heard.
Tibetan monks chant their mantras, believing that doing so are bringing peace to the world and people. Despite their persecutions and decades of exiles. This made me think that perhaps, I play the piano, not to perform, or to build a career, but because playing the piano brings out the best in me. I weave my love, passion, hopes, dreams, and grand thoughts and feelings into each note and music I send off. Perhaps, that’s the point. If I were to play wholeheartedly, every day, maybe that in itself, is already good.
According to neuroscience, you cannot wait for motivations to come to you. You have to start whatever you want to be motivated to do. Starting is your responsibility. Motivation kicks in after you start. When I really wonder if I really have to practice today too, I put a timer on for twenty minutes and tell myself, I can take a break, or even a day off, if I still wanted to after twenty minutes. Usually, by the time the timer comes on, I want to keep on going. Let’s not ask “WHY” we do what we have committed ourselves to doing, but “HOW” to keep on going, when it feels difficult.
From 6AM, I live-stream my morning practice every day from Monday to Friday, going over one variation per day from Bach’s Goldberg Variations. One day, I received an email from an old friend. “I cannot join your every morning, but knowing that you are well, energized and doing this every morning, encourages me every day.”
GREAT advice. This should be taught in school.
Thank you, Larry!